A Princely Plan step 1 Survival
by Kazza
Summary: On step 1 to a new life. Severus Snape is rescued from the shack by his eccentric great-grandmother. But will he survive his injuries and the plots & plans of Madame Medusa Prince? DH pre-epilogue. AU with strong canon references. OCs. Humor
1. Chapter 1 Rescue

Warning - This story takes place in and after 'Deathly Hallows'. It contains many references to events that occurred in 'Deathly Hallows'. So, if you haven't read 'Deathly Hallows' yet and you don't want to be spoiled then why are you here!

Disclaimer - I own no rights whatsoever to anything in or relating to the Harry Potter books and franchises. Harry Potter and all its related copyrights belong to far prettier, nicer, kinder and smarter people than me. This is merely a fan's story meant as a little fannish fun and no copyright breaches are intended.  
All typos, spelling mistakes and bad grammar are copyright to Kazza. :)

Author's note - This is the first in a series of A Princely Plan stories that give a possible alternative future for Severus Snape. I will follow the canon as best I can, although I will ignore any statements about Snape's death made outside of the books by J.K. Rowling. These stories will all be humorous, albeit a dark and corny humour.  
Happy reading,  
Kazza.  
P.S. I have provided Severus Snape with a family. Anyone who has read my now-very-AU story 'Wizard's Honour' may recognise a character or two here.

* * *

A Princely Plan - Survival

by Kazza

Chapter 1 - Rescue

or Excuse me, dunderhead, but I'm not dead yet!

* * *

Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger missed the rescue.

In their defense, missing it was completely understandable. Witnessing the apparent death of headmaster Snape at the fangs and coils of a magically enlarged serpent was a very sensible reason for Ron and Hermione to leave the shack as soon as possible. Not to mention having a previous appointment to save Hogwarts and the wizarding world from the violent rampages and bad speeches of the self-styled Lord Voldemort.

But, in hindsight, it would have been just as sensible if Ron and Hermione hadn't assumed that Headmaster Snape was dead. For seven years experience should have taught them not to assume anything about Severus Snape.

Like the muggle boy scout he could have been in his youth, Severus Snape was always prepared. But sometimes what he prepared for wasn't exactly what happened.  
Since the attack on Arthur Weasley some years before, the former potions master had been concerned about the snake Nagini. He was so concerned that, if one of Voldemort's Death Eaters had asked the Bloody Baron, the Baron would have said that Snape was "completely and obsessively paranoid about being bitten by the snake". However, none of the Death Eaters bothered to ask the Baron, so his bloodiness kept his opinion to himself.

Thanks to his paranoia, Snape had been dosing himself with an antivenin, conveniently discovered by St Mungos, each time he was likely to find himself in the presence of Nagini. That part of his plan had been successful and the snake's poison was doing little damage to Snape's body. Unfortunately, the massive blood loss and crushing from Nagini's attack were most definitely killing him.

The sound of Ron and Hermione's departing footsteps echoed hollowly through the open doorway and around the room. Soon enough the sound died away and the room fell silent save for the occasional creaking of the shack's walls and the near-impossibly slow, quiet breathing of the room's sole occupant.

If the Headmaster was conscious he would have cursed the Fates and his poor luck. But as he was unconscious and near death he could only lie upon the cold floor and project an aura of unconscious unhappiness.

ooooooo

Six and a half minutes earlier.

Medusa was Not Happy.

Medusa was rarely happy but today was an especially bad day for her plans were falling around her.

The elderly witch had planned her twilight years for decades. Her four children and many grandchildren would provide Medusa with a queenly old age; surrounding her in musty and moth-eaten splendour and a multitude of great-grandchildren who she planned would amuse her and carry on the family name.

Instead Medusa found her family disappearing from around her; thanks to politics, poor eating habits, poorer marriage choices, and a fondness for experimenting with volatile potions. So dramatic was the loss of family members that Medusa had eventually found it necessary to 'un-disown' her half-blood great-grandson. This had turned out to be a wise move for a few years ago the said great-grandson had becomes Medusa's sole living relative and thereby her sole heir.

It was around that time that Medusa had retired the family clock, an ancient grandmother clock that solemnly recorded the lives of the Prince family but did little else. She had replaced the clock with a family pocket watch with the latest family monitoring charms.

If the screaming alarm sounding now from Medusa's pocket watch was accurate, then she was about to lose her sole remaining relative.

"I shall not allow that, Severus!" Medusa snarled at the tiny watch hand that was pointing at an even tinier sign that flashed 'mortally wounded.

For a few moments the old witch considered what to do. Almost a minute had passed before she smiled wickedly as a new plan formed in her devious and slightly-senile mind.

The room fell silent as Medusa activated the vibrate only charm on her watch. Then, with a melodramatic flourish of her hand, she activated the medical emergency charm by the cottage's front door.

"You have not provided me with a great-great-grandchild and until then I forbid you to die," muttered Medusa fiercely while she summoned her hat, cloak, and cane.

Two minutes later Ilario Laurencetti, Mediwizard to Baldoro's Magical Retirement Village, apparated into the sitting room of Medusa's tiny cottage.

"Signora Prince, you called for help? What is wrong?" Ilario was surprised to see the elderly lady dressed to leave her house and standing just inside the door.

"About time you arrived," Medusa adjusted her hat to just the right angle for a witch of her generation and waked commandingly towards the mediwizard.

"Are you injured, Signora?" Ilario had raised his wand and was preparing to cast a diagnosis charm.

"Yes," Madam Prince snapped. "My family tree is in danger of expiring and requires immediate medical attention." With that she grasped hold of the mediwizard's arm with her bony hand.

Medusa pressed the little watch against the back of Ilario's hand. Ilario was about to pull his arm free when the old witch murmured the password to activate the watch's locator portkey and the elderly witch and young mediwizard were whisked away from the tiny cottage.

oooooo

Hogsmead was an horrific mess.

A few dead and injured witches and wizards lay amid the rubble and rubbish-strewn streets. It appeared from the mess almost as though the combatants had been using the town's rubbish bins as weapons.  
The portkey deposited the Prince Matriarch and the confused mediwizard into Hogsmeade, just outside the door of the Shrieking Shack. The shack's ragged door hung ajar in a disconcerting manner.

"Where have you taken me?" Ilario's panicked gaze swept across the partially ruined town and the people who needed medical attention.

"Typical," Medusa muttered as she looked at town's streets, "put a man in charge and the first thing that slips is the cleaning." The slightly-mad old witch turned away from Hogsmeade and pushed the shack's front door open.

"This way, Signor Laurencetti." Medusa thwacked the mediwizard's heel with her cane. Ilario stepped away Medusa and stumbled through the open door of the gloomy shack.

A gory sight awaited him.

Headmaster Snape still lay as his former students and Voldemort's pet had left him; lying on the floor in a pool of his own blood.

"I want you to heal my great-grandson," commanded Medusa, the instant she had stepped into the room.

Ilario, who was standing stunned by the shock of seeing the near-dead wizard said nothing. Medusa raised her cane and tapped Ilario's backside with it, "Now, sir!"

Ilario blinked, then his years of training at Sicily's magical hospital kicked in and he began scanning his patient with standard triage spells.

"He is almost dead," Ilario said as he worked. "He should be dead but somehow he is not."

The mediwizard fired a level three wound healing charm at Severus's neck wound. While the wound was sealing, Ilairo pulled open the satchel he always carried when on duty. The young mediwizard grabbed two vials of blood replenisher out of the satchel and poured the potions down Snape's healing throat.

"He had crush injuries, Signora," Ilario said while he searched though his stachel. "I have a mild bone repairing potion here but his internal organs will need extra potions."

The Headmaster's body gave a twitch and Ilario fired another charm at Snape's torso. The critically injured man's lungs filled with air when the respiration charm began to work.

Severus twitched again and the mediwizard swore in fluid Italian when Severus's heart shuddered to a halt.

"Don't you dare die!" Medusa commanded. "I forbid it." She hit Severus across the chest with her cane.

Ignoring the old witch's ranting, Ilario fired a heart massaging spell at the now-technically-dead man's heart. Three minutes later the massaging spell dissipated as Severus's heart began to pump on its own - the blood replenishing potions having given it something more to pump.

Ilario sighed and sat back on his heels, "He is alive, Signora Prince but he needs proper medical facilities to survive."

Medusa, who had remained unusually quiet though Ilario's battle to save her great-grandson's life, consulted her pocket watch. The tiny hand now pointed to a new sign which read 'living but in great danger.

oooooo

Medusa's tiny cottage at Baldoro's Retirement Village for Elderly Witches and Wizards was usually quiet when its occupant was away from home. But on this particular day it was anything but quiet. Ilario had not had time to turn off the emergency alarm before Medusa's watch had whisked him away to Britain and the alarm had performed its job well.

"Are you certain Signora Prince is not here?" the manager of the retirement village asked his companions, again.

The mediwitches both gave him their best why-are-you-asking-me-a-silly-question stares and the slimmer of the two commented, "No, Signor, there is no one."

The manager's acidic comment was interrupted by the sound of someone or something portkeying into the cottage.

The portkey deposited Ilario, Medusa and the body-bound Severus into the middle of Medusa's sitting room, Severus's frozen leg narrowly missing the manager's right foot.

Medusa stumbled slightly, regained her footing and glared at the manager, "What a surprise! You are prepared for once."

"I am always prepared, Signora Prince," the manager said pompously to the woman he considered his most aggravating tenant, and who reminded him a little too much of his fierce mother. "Did you activate your alarm?"

"Set off the alarm? Why would I do that?" The cunning old woman looked over to where her unconscious great-grandson was surounded by Mediwizard Laurencetti and the mediwitches. "Someone set off the alarm, Severus. Was it you?"

"No, Signora. A mostly-dead man cannot set off an alarm," Ilario said quellingly. "And please stop avoiding the issue."

"As if I would!" Medusa sneered dramatically and, avoiding the gaze of everyone in the room, she glided majestically and creakily from the room.

"If he survives his injuries," muttered Ilario, "I wonder, will he be able to survive her?"

* * *

End of chapter 1 of Survival.  
(Updated 6 November 2009)


	2. Chapter 2 Reawakening

Disclaimer: the Harry Potter characters and world belong to JK Rowling, and other copyright holders. This story is a bit of fannish silliness and no copyright breaches are intended.

A Princely Plan - story 1 Survival

Part 2: Reawakening  
by Kazza

* * *

Sicilian village life had not change fundamentally in centuries, which suited perfectly the retired inhabitants of Baldoro's Retirement Village that sat on the outskirts of the wizarding town of Kreaki. The elderly witches and wizards at Baldoro's were quite content to be as old fashioned as they wished and still be more modern than the picturesque medieval village. And if the inhabitants, whom Medusa called inmates, wanted a bit more excitement they could floo to the wizarding square in Taormina or the magical quarter of Palermo.

The brochures advertising Baldoro's Retirement Village spoke of beautiful mountain views, quiet streets, delicious Mediterranean food, and secure anti-muggle charms. Charms which, according to the brochure, protect the mature witch and wizard from interruptions to their idyllic retirement by convincing muggles that Kreaki is a collection of partially ruined, modern, very boring and completely unappealing barns. Of course, magical visitors saw Kreaki in all its honey-walled and grey-brown roofed glory.

On this particular morning, Signora Valda Malacuso was waking along one of the picture-postcard streets of Kreaki, a basket of mediwitch supplies floating sedately behind her. It was unusual for Signora Malacuso to make a house call but circumstances had forced her hand, and feet, onto this path.

oooooo

The first sense Severus became aware of was smell. The smell of potions, old books, cotton sheets, and the scent of lavender and belladonna flower perfume.

Something seemed out of place with those smells being at Hogwarts but Severus's brain wasn't up to considering anything more than returning to sleep.

oooooo

Medusa was disconcerted and, though she'd never admit it openly, distressed by her great-grandson's silent form. The Prince men had been notorious for their verbal acuity - their family crest was an acid-spitting wyvern for a reason - and Severus's silence was eating into the old lady.

Medusa did not like seeing Severus looking so startling fragile when he was inactive. He reminded her of a finely built bird of prey; injured and slowly starving of energy. It was obvious to the old witch that the years of mourning, guilt, obsession and duplicity Severus had endured had ravaged his health. Looking down on her great-grandson, Medusa made a promise to herself. She would get him back to health and enjoying life, even if she had to kill him (again) in the process.

The door to Medusa's reading room, which was now Severus's bedroom, opened to admit Signora Malacuso.

"Watching him will not make him wake." Valda Malacuso's tone was as cold as the late spring weather was warm.

"Do come in." Medusa shot a glance at Signora Malacuso, who was already in the room.

"Why is he so still?" Medusa demanded, her tone reminiscent of a medieval duchess to an incompetent serf.

"He was crushed, poisoned, mauled and dead. If not for magic he would be dead." Malacuso's tone was as aggressive as Medusa's was imperious. "He should be in the magical hospital in Palermo. Those injuries require more than 3 days to heal. We do not have the resources to treat him, nor the room!"

Medusa sneered down at the retirement village's chief mediwitch. "You may wish to waste the talents of your mediwizard on handing out headache potions and a sympathetic ear to the bored but healthy inmates here. I would rather see him using his skills well." Medusa smiled evilly, "Or did you hire someone unqualified?"

"Mediwizard Laurencetti is highly qualified."

"Exactly." Medusa stared down at Severus. "So," she continued quietly, "what should I do to hasten his recovery?"

"Nothing," Malacuso replied, "Laurencetti has already told me that he just needs rest and time."

"Ah yes, that old cliche. Time and a peaceful place to rest." Medusa paused and looked around her reading room, then added, "Perhaps somewhere retiring in a peaceful village. Where would I find somewhere like that?"

Medusa gave the mediwitch her patented 'batty old lady' look and waited gleefully for the explosion. Signora Malacuso didn't disappoint.

"It's all a plot, isn't it. You horrible old woman. You want to break all the rules and run the village your way. Well, you're not in charge, I am." The mediwitch stormed out of the cottage, past Ilario Laurencetti who was just entering the cottage.

"Strange," muttered Medusa, "I thought the manager was in charge."

Medusa smirked at the mediwitch's behaviour as Valda slammed the cottage's front door.

"That was very naughty of you Signora." Ilario said quietly.

Medusa drew back and was about to launch a cutting comment at Ilario when he added, "Both of you can be a little childish at times." Ilario smiled his gentle, genuine smile and walked towards the bed. "He has not moved?"

"No."

"I shall turn him to stop pressure sores."

Medusa watched as Ilario tended to Severus's medical needs. Both men looked out of place in Medusa's reading room. The hospital style bed, transfigured from an old reading chair, sat incongruously amongst Medusa's books and knickknacks.

Medusa sighed melodramatically and left the room, leaving both men exactly where she wanted them to be.

"I do hope," Ilario said to his unconscious patient, "that I am never in a duel with those two ladies."

oooooo

The second thing Severus was aware of was sound; the slow tock, tock, tock that only a large clock could make, the murmur of conversation and the sound of his own breathing.

'That's promising,' thought Severus. 'No brimstone or screaming, and I appear to be breathing'

oooooo

Medusa had experienced a number of disappointments. Her first disappointment had been Signora Malacuso's decision not to help her great-grandson. Valda Malacuso had left Ilario and Medusa with no doubt about how much support the mediwizard would not get from his boss.

Ilario Laurencetti was qualified but as the Assistant Mediwizard at Baldoro's Retirement Village he was generally assigned to the lower care patients. That allowed Signora Malacuso, and her trainee assistant, to deal with the high-care patients and those with more complex conditions. While Healer Laurencetti was perfectly able to aid Severus, it was the mediwitch's disregard for Severus that had rattled Medusa who had expected to get her own way in the matter.

Medusa's second disappointment was the lack of speed of Severus's recovery.

Severus's physical needs had been taken care of and his wounds treated but potions and charms could only heal to a point. Only time would heal the deep muscle bruising to Snape's chest and throat. While the potential nerve and brain damage from the attack and its aftermath could only be identified, if it existed, and understood when the patient awoke. And only time would allow him to wake.  
The third disappointment was a blow to Medusa's dreams.

Temporary death had major consequences for wizards. Only that morning, Medusa had received a note from Gringotts advising her that as Severus's sole surviving relative she was his heir. The contents of Headmaster Snape's vault had been transferred to Medusa's vault with unseemly haste for the usually-ponderous goblins. It appeared that they wanted to deal with the infamous headmaster's estate as quickly as possible.

Medusa had transferred her vault to the Sicilian branch of Gringotts when she had moved to Kreaki. She had soon discovered that the goblins at Palermo's Gringotts branch were more secretive than either the London or Zurich goblins.

The Goblins letter had upset Medusa intensely. Technically she had no remaining heirs and if Severus were to die she would have no way to continue the Prince bloodline. Medusa knew she in danger of being forgotten by history and allowing her late husband's family line to expire.

The old witch did not like disappointments and many years ago she had decided that the best way to deal with disappointments was to have a Plan to deal with them. And Medusa's plans were always direct.

oooooo

The third of Severus's senses to return was touch. The feel of crisp cotton sheets on his hands and feet, the softer feel of his nightshirt against his chest, the even softer sensation of the pillow and mattress beneath him, and a harsh ache in his chest.

'I must be in heaven,' though Severus as he moved slightly in the soft cottony cocoon of the bed. However, his heavenly daydreams were interrupted by the sound of footsteps and a stronger scent of lavender and belladonna flowers.

The headmaster was trying to place the scent when something long and thin rapped across his chest.

"I know you're awake, boy!" screamed a familiar voice.

'Oh $%*(!# it!' thought Severus. 'I've gone from heaven to hell'

"Signora Prince!" The sound of a young man speaking Italian erupted into Severus's hearing, "You must Not hit someone who was recently Mostly Dead."

Severus heard another set of footsteps approach the bed and his hand was lifted by the wrist.

"His pulse is strong. He will awaken soon," said the Italian speaking man. "If he wishes to wake, after your behaviour."

'No,' thought Severus, 'I believe I will stay safely asleep.' Unfortunately, someone else had a different opinion.

"Augmenti!"

Severus spluttered awake as Medusa's wand poured water onto his face.

"Ah, Severus. What a surprise. You woke up all by yourself." Medusa smiled wickedly at her great-grandson.

Severus was saved replying by the ranting of a damp and very annoyed mediwizard.

* * *

End of Chapter 2

(updated 6 November 2009)


	3. Chapter 3 Realisation

Disclaimer: I have no copyright rights to the world and characters of Harry Potter; those rights belong to people far prettier and nicer than me. This is merely a piece of silly fannish fun and there is no intents to infringe anyone's copyrights.

Author's Note: Thank you to everyone for your comments, and thank you to the readers who haven't commented but hopefully have enjoyed this story so far.

* * *

A Princely Plan, Story 1: Survival

by Kazza

Part 3 - Realisation

* * *

Severus Snape stared at the tall, stooped, very old woman who was leaving on her cane and staring intently back at him, her watery black eyes almost glowing beneath her heavy grey eyebrows.

"Nothing to say, Severus?" the old witch said in her distinctive accent.

Severus wondered why the old witch was in his room, why it was so sunny at Hogwarts and why he was in pain.

"Speak up, boy." The old witch rapped her cane on the floor.

The Headmaster looked at the spot where her cane had rapped on the floor. He didn't recall there being a wooden floor in the Headmaster's bedroom. Severus shrugged mentally and raised his gaze to the old witch's face, "Good morning."

"Actually it is afternoon, as you would know if you bothered to look at the clock. It can not be sunny at 1am can it, boy? And...," Medusa stopped suddenly when she realised she was ranting about clocks and sunshine. "So you have decided to wake up, child."

"Headmaster," Severus replied coldly, he did not like being nagged and he did not like being disrespected.

"Yes, well that's all behind you now." Medusa waved her wand in the direction of a rickety stool in the corner of the room and summoned it. After she sat on the precariously tilting stool, she continued, "You will stay with me here, child."

"I am not a child, madam," Severus said croakily, his throat was aching intensely and he felt too tired to speak. However, he was determined to make his point, so he continued at barely more than a whisper, "I teach the brats. I protect the brats. I am the Headmaster."

Medusa was about to speak again when Ilario stepped into the conversation.

"Signore Headmaster, please drink some water." Ilario smiled encouragingly at his patient who was looking at him with confusion. Severus was so tired that his ability to translate the Sicilian mediwizard's extremely proper Italian sentence had failed.

"Severus, drink the water," Medusa drawled in English. When her great-grandson hesitated, she added, "It Is Not Poisoned."

While Severus was drinking shakily from a small goblet which he insisted on holding himself, Mediwizard Laurencetti began casting diagnostic charms over the former headmaster. It was evident that Severus was quite weak and tired for he did not complain about the mediwizard's invasion of his privacy. Ilario, who was still not happy that his patient had been awakened too soon, took the opportunity to cast a mild energy replenishing spell over Severus.

Medusa watched silently while Severus finished the water, Ilario took the goblet from his patient and, distracted by his spells, Ilario placed the goblet upon a teetering pile of books. The witch did not like the way Ilario was muttering to himself in Sicilian as the results of the charms appeared on the diagnostic parchment he clutched in his left hand. It annoyed Medusa that Ilario insisted on using a language of which she knew just enough words to barter with the shopkeepers in the village market. The annoying little hufflepuffish wizard was doing it deliberately and Medusa Did Not Like being unable to listen in on his conversation whenever she wanted. She was putting together a list of the punishments she could inflict on Ilario when the mediwizard turned and spoke to her in his perfect Italian.

"Signora, could you please repeat my questions to the patient in English?"

"Would not a translation charm be simpler?"

"I believe the questions would be best coming from you, Signora." Ilario's overly calm expression alarmed Medusa slightly and she nodded her acceptance of the plan.

"Do you have any pain?" Ilario nodded at Medusa who said, "Severus, the healer wants to know 'do you have any pain?'"

Severus considered his reply. He found it strange that he knew the old witch's accent was pure upper-middleclass Derbyshire with a slightly overly-proper pronunciation style, her clothes were about 30 years out of fashion and were made by one of the best wizarding tailors, and her attitude screamed I-was-in-Slytherin. And yet he couldn't recall her name or how he knew these things or why she kept addressing him by his first name. Something, perhaps an instinct, told him that she was dangerous but she wouldn't kill him. And he was sure the fresh-faced young mediwizard was totally harmless.

"Yes, in my chest, throat and back," Severus replied raspily.

Medusa repeated the reply to Ilario who nodded and added to his notes.

"Signora, please do not add to my questions." The mediwizard continued, "Please tell the patient 'we will treat the pain soon but we must check a few things first. Please answer the questions. Can you tell me, what is your full name?' "

Medusa glared at Ilario and, ignoring the editorial comments from him, said, "The mediwizard will give you pain relief soon. He wants you to answer some questions. What's your full name?"

Severus considered saying nothing but then, realising the old woman would keep badgering him, Snape decided that he was too tired to argue, "Severus Tobias Snape."

He heard another conversation in Italian before the old woman asked, "How long have you been headmaster of Hogwarts?"

"Since June," Severus smirked, he knew that one.

"And what month is it now?" asked the old lady.

Severus hesitated then answered, "November?" From the look on the witch's face he'd got that one wrong.

"Who is the British Minister for Magic?" Medusa waited for a cutting reply about idiot politicians from her great-grandson. She was disappointed and surprised when he merely sighed and replied, "Cornelius Fudge," the wrong answer again.

Medusa decided to jump in and asked her own question, "Severus, who are Harry Potter's parents?" He must know that one.

Severus gave her a quizzical look and replied, "James Potter and ... um ... er ... Mrs Potter." He wondered why she was asking him such a strange question. Who cared who James Potter had married? Whoever she was, she must have been rather stupid to have married Potter.

The old witch was surprised into silence. Her great-grandson, the man who had spent his entire life being obsessed with Lily Evans Potter, the man who couldn't go a single day without a melodramatic self-imposed reaction to the loss the object of his obsession, couldn't remember The Woman. What in the world had been done to Severus to make him forget her?

She was so stunned that Medusa repeated Ilario's next question without thinking about it. "Who is the woman asking you these questions?"

"I do not know," Severus closed his eyes. "May I have those potions now?"

Ilario quickly attended to his patient and soon Severus was once again sleeping peacefully. The mediwizard turned to the old witch and discovered her sitting as still as stone, a single tear running down her wrinkled cheek.

"Signora, you must not be distressed. He will get better. He had just lost a great deal of his memories, and his mind and his brain will need time to recover. For someone who was dead he is doing very well." He gently helped Medusa to her feet, "Come Signora, let us go and have a cup of that tea you like so much. You have just had a bit of a shock and you are not as tough as you like people to think. Hmmm?"

Ilario had walked Medusa across the room and was opening the door for her when she turned to him, "Not as tough as I like people to think? No, Signore Laurencetti, I am tougher than I like them to think I am."

"Of course, Signora." Ilario said quietly. He smiled kindly and patted the old lady's hand, "Now where is that cup of tea you promised me?" He shepherded the old lady out the door and quietly closed it behind them.

* * *

End of Part 3


	4. Chapter 4 The Queens Move

Disclaimer: Please see Part 1

A Princely Plan – Survival

by Kazza

Part 4 – The Queens' Move

* * *

Severus Snape was annoyed.

He had sorted his life out perfectly as well as his death. He may not have wanted to die but he did not anticipate that once he died anyone would be so unpardonably rude as to revive him. He lay in his bed and pondered who could have done something so aggravating and kind (although he'd never admit that). He began imagining what nasty detention he could force upon his rescuer and how many hundreds of cauldrons he would ask them to clean.

Severus's eloquent neural rant, or tantrum as Medusa would have phrased it, was cut off by a strange mental pulling sensation. One moment Severus was grumpily character assassinating his rescuer, the next he was somewhere completely different. The room was grey and foggy, the voices he heard were familiar but their words were garbled.

Severus checked he didn't have cotton wool in his ears. He found a small blob of wax but nothing large enough to block his hearing.

The eerie black and white world was clearing now. The greyness thinned like slowly lifting smog; a smog filled with voices.

"Did you see that?" a deep male voice boomed.

"Did he move?" a mature female voice said.

"More colour and movement I'd say," a third voice added over the burbling conversation.

Severus opened his mouth to tell them what they could do with their 'colour and movement' when he felt the dragging sensation again. Severus's senses rebelled as noise and bright light erupted around him. "What the f--!"

"Severus!" Medusa's wavering voice betrayed her concern, "Good to see you back, child."

"Signor. Please squeeze my hand."

Severus looked down at the mediwizard's left hand which was lightly clutching Severus's right hand. The former headmaster pulled his hand from the mediwizard's loose grasp and glared dramatically at the younger man.

"What do you think you are doing, you cretinous Italian fraud?"

"I am checking if you are well." Ilario's replied in a calm placating tone which annoyed Severus more than the hand holding. "You almost went into a coma, Signor. I need to discover if your condition has a physical cause."

"Really." Snape's tone dripped sarcasm.

"Severus, it is rewarding that you are feeling more like yourself," Medusa interrupted, sounding for the world like Albus Dumbledore in nagging mdre. "But kindly be polite to Ilario. If he doesn't fix you who will? The British Ministry of magic? St Mungos? Whom do you recommend?"

The fuming glare that Severus fired at Medusa would have melted the resolve of any Hogwart's first year student. The elderly witch simply smirked wickedly, then cackled when Severus thrust his hand at Ilario.

"Not that there is anything wrong with me." Severus muttered under his breath.

Ilario squeezed Severus's hand and the former headmaster gave a weak squeeze in return.

"Did you see or hear anything, Signor?"

"Greyness, insipid conversations. No difference really."

Ilario gave Severus his best quelling stare, which Severus judged wouldn't have scared a flobberworm, and Snape added, "And a pulling sensation."

"Pulling! Not falling?" Ilario waved his wand over his patient, his medical quill jotting down the readings in a notebook.

"I know what I experienced. If you can't be bothered to listen to me it would be best if…"

"Severus!" Thwack! Medusa's cane rapped her great-grandson's ankle. Severus glared petulantly at her and crossed his arms. No further comment came from him.

"I must look up this symptom." Ilario stood and began walking towards the door, his attention on the sheet of parchment. As the mediwizard opened the door he turned and said, "If you kill each other I shall be most aggravated and disappointed. It shall mean much paperwork."

"You are in trouble," Medusa said, after Ilario had left.

"He was addressing both of us." Snape tugged weakly at the bedcovers.

"Yes," Medusa said sweetly. The old lady reached over and pulled Severus's bedcovers up for him. "However, he did not scold me for hitting you." Medusa lifted her cane and waved it threateningly at Severus's ankle. "No dying. No going into a coma. And no back-chatting your kind, sweet, innocent great-grandmamma."

"What? Great-grandmamma Snape is still alive?" Severus glared back at her.

Medusa growled and stomped creakily out of the room. She had no idea where the boy got his behaviour from. It must have been his muggle father because Severus was absolutely nothing like her!

oooooooo

It was a beautiful morning in Kreaki village. The scent of the geraniums wafted into the cottage to where Medusa sat, eating a leisurely breakfast. The old witch sipped her tea; indulging in one of the few foods she insisted on retaining from her life in her homeland.

Medusa didn't miss England because, for all Sicily's alienness, she had found more friends in the retirement village than she'd had in England. Time, her reputation, war and old age had reduced her British friends to a small handful at best, and Medusa's ability to get herself thrown out of retirement villages hadn't helped. She had been asked to leave the wizarding retirement villages in Cornwall and France, and it had taken the recommendation of an acquaintance, one who was in some ways an enemy, to get Medusa her place in Sicily.

She would have rejected the offer of assistance if Albus Dumbledore had not been so very insistent that she move to a place with a strong magical Ministry that did not allow extraditions for membership of magical organisations. Medusa was no fool and she had known without a further word from Dumbledore that he was planning a refuge for her great-grandson. Therefore she had allowed Albus to further her own plans by his plotting.

When they had met six years ago, it had been decades since Medusa had spoken with Albus who as a teenager had come to her attention as simply a Gryffindor in the same year at Hogwarts as her younger son.

Medusa recalled with silent glee the look on Albus's face when she had invited herself to a meeting at Hogwarts. The Prince matriarch had endured three generations of acid tongued, highly academically minded, socially awkward and obsessive Prince men.

She easily recalled that particular morning six years ago. Hogwarts had been sitting silently in Scottish grandeur; the weather extraordinarily mild for mid-summer, however Medusa had paid no attention to the beauty of her surroundings when she had headed into the castle on her self-appointed mission.

Medusa had a problem. She needed another heir. After producing four children, two of whom had died in infancy, then having both her surviving sons married off and both of them providing the family with multiple children. Medusa found herself in the unenviable position of having outlived everyone in her family except for one grandson and her currently-disowned great-grandson.

The situation had not been helped by the notorious obsessiveness of the Prince family's wizards. For over a hundred years Medusa had survived: her father's obsession with privacy; her husband's (who was also her first cousin thanks to her father's obsession) obsessions with potions and quidditch; her two sons' obsessions with blood purity and ballroom dancing respectively; and her grandchildren's many obsessions.

But now Medusa was at an obsession impasse. Her sole surviving grandson, Justin Snape, was obsessed with his late wife, Mabel, who had not only been much older than him but had only been accepted by her Jason's father as Mabel had been as addicted to ballroom dancing as her father-in-law. After the death of Mabel at the age of 106, 43 year old Justin had refused to consider marriage to anyone else and for years had maintained a shrine to Mabel. Medusa had tried cajoling Jason and nagging, compulsive potions, and was considering hypnotherapy when she remembered Severus.

Thus the point of that day's meeting.

She had the strong impression that Albus Dumbledore had not been sure if he should have been mildly amused, highly amused or terrified at her arrival. Medusa remembered him as a skinny eleven year old who was very conscious of his appearance.

Albus had recalled her vaguely from his school years as the mother of two fellow students, the Prince brothers. He remembered that the elder Prince brother had been in Slytherin and the younger in Ravenclaw. Both of them had excelled academically and both of them had been slightly mad, which was probably due to too much inbreeding in the Prince family line.

"Madam Prince, welcome. Do please come in," Albus had smiled encouragingly but not too encouragingly at the slightly stooped elderly witch. Meeting someone of his parent's generation was a little daunting, even at Albus's great age.

"None of that nonsense from you, young man!" Medusa had smirked mischievously up at Albus. "You may think you know everything but I know better."

"What did you wish to discuss?"

"My great-grandson, Severus Snape."

Dumbledore had nodded sagely.

"It's long past time he was doing his duty for his family. He should be married and providing heirs."

Dumbledore had blinked then, his eyes twinkling enthusiastically, said quietly, "Have you discussed this with Professor Snape?"

"Of course not!" Medusa scolded Albus. "It's none of his business."

"I am not sure I follow the thread of your argument, Madam Prince."

"It is my business to see the family line is continued. And, if it has to be an arranged marriage at wandpoint it will be."

"I see. Your family is quite … determined about many things."

"Obsessed is the word you are looking for, Albus. That is my problem. Almost all the men in my family have got themselves killed or died by some means and I need heirs to keep the family line alive. My good for nothing grandson is impossibly devoted to his late wife's memory. So it will have to be 'the half blood'."

"He does have a name."

"I know. He was named for my late husband."

"Professor Snape is a very capable man. I cannot imagine him falling for your intrigues."

"Why not? He's been bludger-bashed between you and Marvolo Gaunt's half-blood lunatic grandson for the last 10 years. Why not add an extra player to your Quidditch match?" Medusa smirked.

"How do you know that?" Albus had asked, surprised that this old witch knew Voldemort's true identity.

"It's rather obvious to anyone with the eyes to see and … enough history." Medusa quipped. "The Gaunts were always a mad rabble."

"Regardless, I am Severus's employer and friend, madam. I cannot aid you to change Severus's life without his consent."

"He has a lady friend then?"

"Not that I am aware."

"You aren't chasing him, you old queen?"

"No, Madam Prince, I am not a queen and I am not chasing him!" Albus huffed.

Albus had watched Medusa gaze pointedly at his lavender and ivory robes, raise one of her slim, grey eyebrows and smirk. "Really, your majesty? One old Queen to another?"

"Stop that, Madam. Severus Snape is not interested in me nor anyone else alive."

Instantly Medusa had stopped teasing Albus and fixed him with an intent stare, "Who was she?"

"I beg your pardon?" Albus had begun to think that he should contact Alastor Moody and let him know that the aurors had missed recruiting an interrogation specialist in Medusa Prince.

"The dead woman he is obsessed with."

"That is Professor Snape's story to tell." Dumbledore had paused, "How did you know …?"

"He may be a half blood but he's a Prince male. They're all bloody obsessed with something, child."

"Well, then he is a true Prince madam." Albus had smiled, determined to get the last word in this conversation which he'd most certainly lost.

"Not yet." Medusa had said quietly. "But he will be."

Later that day Medusa had met the adult Severus for the first time. He had reacted like a grumpy Hungarian Horntail which had endeared him to the old woman so much that she'd instantly had proceeded to restore his inheritance.

Medusa's small foray into Albus's world had added quite a few discovers about her great-grandson to the information she had received from his mother, Eileen. Medusa had disagreed with her husband's reasons for disinheriting Eileen. Following the 'wrong' quidditch team was not a valid reason for disinheriting a grandchild but Severus Prince, Medusa's late husband, had been obsessed with his team and no other team allegiances were allowed in his family. So soon as her husband's death Medusa had disobeyed his instructions and had begun writing to Eileen.

In her letters, Eileen had told Medusa about Severus's close friend Lily, a muggleborn witch. Medusa knew well the Prince males' tendency to become obsessive and, years later, it had taken her only a few moments to recognise the lost love Dumbledore eluded to as Lily Evans. Or as Medusa liked to think of her "that insipid Gryffindor chit that married the Potter heir in Severus's year".

Yet, while the Prince men could be obsessive so could the Prince women in their own way. Medusa was obsessed with Severus and was determined to 'adjust' his life.

As she sat sipping her tea Medusa decided that Severus's memory lapse was just a little set-back that she was determined to fix. She would get 'her boy' well, whole and spitting verbal-acid like the proud Prince wyvern she had met that day six years ago.

ooooooo

Severus woke abruptly. His fingers and toes slowly unclenched while his mind began processing the messages his brain was receiving. He was somewhere warm but not balmy in a room he didn't recognise but it felt familiar in some way.

Snape slowly pulled his body up until he was sitting in the bed, his back leaning against the bland headboard. Severus raised his hands and looked at them. They seemed uninjured. They must have escaped the snake's attack. He felt his neck and the ridged scar that should have been the death of him. Suddenly he coughed and his ribs told him they were not healthy.

'Typical,' thought Severus, 'Someone rescues me and they can't be bothered to heal me properly.'

The door to the cluttered room opened and the slightly stooped elderly figure of Medusa Prince entered the room.

"Great-grandmother!" Severus exclaimed then coughed as his previous crushed ribs and lungs argued with his loud speech.

"Severus?" Medusa glared at her wayward great-grandson. "How dare you let me think you had forgotten me!"

Severus scowled at the eccentric old lady that he hadn't seen in years. "What are you talking about woman? How could I forget you?"

"You did Severus. It appears that you have now forgotten forgetting me."

Severus glared at Medusa and her nonsensical statements. It was definitely time to send the old bat to a retirement home.

End of Part 4

(Updated 6 November 2009)


	5. Chapter 5 The Specialist

Disclaimer - I own no rights whatsoever to anything in or relating to the Harry Potter books and franchises. Harry Potter and all its related copyrights belong to far prettier, nicer, kinder and smarter people than me. This is merely a fan's story meant as a little fannish fun and no copyright breaches are intended.

All typos, spelling mistakes and bad grammar are copyright to Kazza. :)

A Princely Plan - Survival by Kazza

Chapter 5  
The Specialist  
or  
Not more dunderhead mediwizards!  
-

In her bedroom, Medusa was resting with a refreshing and calming cup of chamomile tea. The acidic old woman would not admit to anyone that the last week or so had been a strain on her body and mind, but she was currently feeling every one of her many, many years.

Medusa was drifting off to sleep when she heard the door to the cottage open. The picture frame by her bed showed who was entering her territory Ilario Laurencetti and a conservatively fashionable wizard in his middle years. Medusa deduced that this must be the Master Healer whom Ilario had talked of consulting.

The wizards were walking towards Severus s room. Medusa decided she was too tired to question if it was safe to allow the mediwizard near Severus, so she took a sip of her rapidly-cooling tea and lay back on her bed to rest.

OoOOoo

Severus was leafing through one of Medusa's books when the mediwizards entered the room.

"Good morning," Ilario Laurencetti smiled kindly and moved towards the bed. "How are you feeling today?"

Sarcasm dripped off Severus as he raised an eyebrow and replied coldly, ""Thrilled.

The older wizard stepped forward and peered intently at Severus s face. "Your eyes see well?" he asked in heavily-accented English.

"I have perfect eyesight." Snape sneered and leant away from the stranger who had invaded his room as though it was the stranger's own.

"You saw mist," said the man as he peered into Snape s eyes. "How often you see this?"

Severus resisted the urge to be a teacher and correct the man's grammar, and said icily, "And you are?"

"Pardon". The mediwizard smiled slightly. "I am Professore Davide Cammetti, Senior Mind-Wizarding Mediwizard and instructor at the Roma Sanitorium."

Severus glared at the Laurencetti. "So much for patient secrecy!"

"I always keep my patients' secrets!" Cammetti's fierce tone washed over Severus with all the force of an angry eagle snapping at a grumpy wyern. It was fortunate for both of them that Rubeus Hagrid wasn't present to see them snapping like magical creatures, for the eccentric half-giant may have tried to adopt them.

"Really?" Severus sneered again.

"Yes. I do not know your full name, sir. I do not need to know it to advise upon your health issues." Cammetti had now reverted to succinctly-enunciated Italian.

"My mind is my own and I am perfectly sane." Snape replied, rudely sticking to English. The headmaster couldn't believe the arrogance of this man.

Ilario began attempting to sooth Snape, who glared at Laurencetti when the man straightened out Snape's blankets. Snape waited until Laurencetti had turned his back and then tugged on the blanket to make it uneven again.

Professore Cammetti waited for the younger mediwizard to finish flitting around his patient, all the while Cammetti watched Snape. He observed the tense expression and the slightly unfocussed gaze of the obviously quick-witted patient.

Ilario turned back to face Severus and was about to tell him off when Severus said, "I do not need to be coddled. I am an adult, a respected Headmaster and I..."

Severus's gaze suddenly faltered, a mist passed over the surface of his eyes and he passed out.

Cammetti cast a charm to measure his patient's mental activity and detected a distinct drain.

"He died!" It was a statement, not a question.

Ilario nodded. "For a minute, perhaps 90 seconds. He has recovered well since then, Professore."

"The amount of time is irrelevant in this case." Cammetti cast another charm.

"He also lost memories. He surrendered them before his temporary death."

"How much of his memory?"

"I do not know. I have only surmised this from his forgetfulness, our conversations, and Signora Medusa's comments that he has forgotten a woman he was obsessed over."

"Many memories then, to forget an obsession." The Professore paused and considered his patient. "If they are not being used to complete the spell then perhaps..." Cammetti fired another charm at Severus

ooOOoo

Meanwhile, Snape was annoyed which was not unusual and not arguing with two mediwizards, which was unusual. The mist still hung over his eyes pulling him towards something.

"Sir, do you hear me?" Cammetti's voice echoed in his head.

"Yes. Of course I do. I can't get away from you annoying Italians," thought Severus, all the time wondering how powerful a legillimens Cammetti was.

"If you hear me you need to say so." The Professore's voice echoed through Severus' skull.

"I did, you idiotic man."

"Good. Keep talking like that."

"I always talk like this, you dunderhead."

"Did you hear that?" a muffled voice said somewhere near Severus.

"Someone spoke, was it you?" another muffled voice said.

"Sir," Cammetti's voice rang loudly in his head, "did you ever commission a portrait?"

"I am a Hogwarts Headmaster. They all have portraits - annoying portraits."

"And headmistresses," an irate muffled female voice added.

A gaggle of voices told the woman to hush and she said, "Hush yourselves, and that includes you Phineas."

"Headmaster, you are being pulled into a portrait. Each time this happens the spell becomes more complete. You need to break your agreement with the charm or your mind will be locked in the portrait and your body will be left in a coma."

Severus felt a powerful charm wash over him and his vision began to clear. He was in the wall of the Headmaster s office at Hogwarts.

"Good to see you my boy!" Albus Dumbledore smiled benevolently from his frame.

"I'm not dead yet!" Severus snarled.

"Rubbish," said Phineas Black. "You can't be living and be a dead master."

~~~ End chapter 5 ~~~

Updated 14 June 2011


	6. Chapter 6

A Princely Plan  
Part 6 Conversations

It took Severus a few minutes to resurface from the mental haze that had wafted over like the sugar filled haze of a first year student after eating twelve chocolate frogs in half an hour.

Unlike Gregory Goyle, who had taken half a day to recover from his sugar-doze, Severus Snape was soon brought to consciousness by the enthusiastic use of a smelling salt charm by Ilario. Severus lurched backwards, away from the smell of burning feathers, and hit the back of his head against the headboard of the bed.

"Laurencetti! Please avoid concussing the patient!" Professore Cammetti shot a stern look at the younger mediwizard.

Ilario cancelled the spell and said, "It works well on the old ladies." He then found himself the victim of former-Professor Snape's 'you are going to be in detention until the next century' student-melting-glare-number-4. The successful glare was quite an achievement by Severus for he was feeling very unwell and still a little unfocussed.

Cammetti sighed and stepped around the quivering Ilario. "Laurencetti, go check on Signora Prince. I shall tend to the patient's needs." He shooed Ilario out of the small room and returned his attention to Severus.

"Now, Headmaster Snape," Davide Cammetti continued in fluid Italian. "Do you need a translation spell? Or can you understand me clearly?"

Severus hesitated a moment before beginning to reply, and Cammetti did not bother to wait for Snape muttered, "I am not a dunderhead," before the mediwizard cast a translation charm on both of them.

"There, that is much easier for both of us." The mediwizard reached for Severus's wrist and, ignoring the younger man's petulant gaze, said, "You remind me of my mentor at the university, Headmaster. I believe you must be a specialist in your field, yes?"

Severus Snape continued to glare at the mediwizard and replied, "I was the younger Potions Master at Hogwarts in three centuries, and the youngest Headmaster for six centuries."

"That must have been very challenging work for anyone under eighty years of age," Cammetti said, as he cast a few medical observation charms over the wizard in the bed. "It is usual to give senior roles to older wizards and witches who have the networks to support them."

Severus looked up at the mediwizard and snarled, "I worked alone. None of the dunderheads would trust me even if they would work with me."

Professore Cammetti nodded while he checked the results of Severus's scans on the observations scroll that sat atop a pile of books.

"Yes, well that is their loss. I have read much of the supposedly evil Headmaster Snape in the newspapers," he ignored his patient's glare of suspicion and continued in a calm voice, "and it seems to me that the powers that be in England are disorganised, self-centred idiots who are too busy arguing to see the worth of the people around them. You are best out of that situation."

"What do you know of my situation?" snarled Snape, warily.

"Only what I have read, and the evidence that your health is poor thanks to many years of stress and neglect of your diet. And, that now that the English are paying attention to what you did, that they are crowing your praises to the Press." Cammetti smiled, and checked the back of Severus's head where it had hit the bedhead. Then he calmly added. "Oh, and what our colleagues have mentioned about you."

Severus was about to demand, "What 'colleagues of ours', you idiot?" when Professore Cammetti flipped over the collar of his coat to reveal a pin of the Ancient European Society Of Potion-makers (AESOP).

AESOP was a legendary group of Potions Makers, Potions Masters, Poisoners and Potion Making Mediwizards which had admitted only three members from Britain this century, and Severus was one of those three.

Over the last year former Headmaster Snape had been so busy keeping himself alive, finding ways to get magical swords to ungrateful Gryffindors, feeding the ego of a mad dark lord, and dying, that he had completely forgotten that he belonged to a fabled, ethically dubious academic society.

"Are you going to poison me?" Snape raised his chin in gesture of defiance, albeit the defiance of a man as weak as a half-starved kitten that had been chased by a dog, fallen down a drain and was snarling at a well-fed, cunning tom cat that was considering drowning it with its paw.

"No, of course not." Professore Cammetti smiled, overly calmly. "I am going to heal you and conveniently forget that I met you." The Professore grinned, "And keep the delightful knowledge that you and I have outsmarted all those English idiots." 'And', he added silently to himself, 'get revenge for England daring to knock Italy out of the last three Quidditch World Cups.'

* * *

Meanwhile, at Hogwarts…

"This," announced Phineas Nigellus regally from his frame and pointing his painted arm at the empty space awaiting Headmaster Snape's protrait, "is All Your Fault."

"And why so, Phineas?" Albus looked over the painted rims of his spectacles at his fellow headmaster's portrait.

"You know exactly why." Phineas turned his back in his most dramatic 'I was a Slytherin Headmaster' fashion. "You use people and get them killed."

"So did you!"

"I did not." Phineas sneered over his shoulder at Dumbledore.

"Oh, yes you did." Dumbledore put his hands on his hips and looked rather like a very elderly, painted, belligerent Ron Weasley. "What about Bartlett Raye?"

"Oh, no I didn't. Raye fell on that sword. I did not use him up."

"You did."

"Didn't."

"Did."

"Didn't."

"Did!"

"Didn't!"

"Did!"

"Do you ever get the feeling," one of the former Ravenclaw Headmistresses commented dryly. "That some headmasters can be a little too much like their students?"

"What?" replied a grinning former Hufflepuff Headmaster, speaking over the voices of Dumbledore and Nigellus, "You've just noticed now?"

"Didn't. Didn't. Didn't."

"Did. Did. Did. Double Did with a sherbet lemon on top."

"Oh Merlin's grey underpants," muttered a former Gryffindor Headmaster, "not the bally sherbet lemons again."

Hogwarts silently sighed in agreement while two of it's esteemed former Headmasters continued to behave like naughty First Years.

* * *

Severus felt the pull of the spell on his mind and focussed on Davide Cammetti's plan. There was only one way that Snape could have freedom from the spell. Headmaster Snape activated his mental shields and focussed his thoughts on Hogarts itself.

"Hogwarts Castle, can you hear me?" Severus channelled as much mental energy as he could find into the thought as the pulling increased on his mind.

"Can You Hear Me?"

"Owww! No need to yell, laddie. I can hear ye fine." Hogwarts replied. Severus gave a mental blink at the castle's 'voice' which reminded him of the fussy older Scots lady who ran the sickeningly sweet café in Hogsmeade. The café Severus had avoided so well that he couldn't remember its name.

"Is that you, Headmaster Snape?" The castle's motherly voice pierced in his mind with all the unsubtlety of Rebeus Hagrid at a two-for-one magical creatures sale at Dragons Are Us.

"Yes." Severus winced and put his hands to his aching temples.

"So, you're coming to join us now, dearie." Hogwarts boomed, "Won't that be grand."

"No."

"No!" Hogwarts boomed even more loudly. "And why not? I know the other Headmasters can be a wee childish sometimes but that is no reason to be shy or rude."

"I don't deserve to be on the wall of Hogwarts." Severus thought firmly. "I deserted my post as Headmaster. I lowered the wards. I let the Death Eaters in. I didn't protect the children."

"So you say. But there was a war on, laddie. And most of the children were much safer than there were in earlier wars, until the fightin' started."

"I do not deserve the honour. I do not want a portrait." There was no way after surviving so much that Snape was going to let some millennium old castle tell him what to do. Or let it put him into a coma.

"Are you sure, dearie?"

"Yes. And stop calling me 'dearie'!"

"Very well. Although I don't agree with your argument, I will free you from the charm."

"Thank you." Severus said rather weakly.

"You could have saved a lot of time, ye know, if you'd just said 'I was dead but now I'm not'." Hogwarts laughed. "Hogwarts will call upon ye sometime in the future, Headmaster Snape, but for now you are free … sweetheart."

Severus's mind crashed back fully into his body and the pain in his head erupted.

"Bloody school!" Snape said and passed out in front of the mediwizards.

* * *

Four hours and twenty three minutes later Severus Snape, former Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and free man, awoke.

In a perfect world designed to suit Severus's every needs and preferences he would have awoken in a large, book-filled bedroom with no one in sight for miles around and a fit and healthy body. In the unperfect world he awoke in a small, book and knickknack filled bedroom, with Davide Cammetti sitting patiently reading one of Medusa's books by the bed, and in an unfit and unhealthy body.

Severus's headache, however, was gone.

"I wish to confirm that you are no longer affected by the portrait charm." Cammetti said. He placed Medusa's book back on one of the teetering piles of books and began to fire a series of pointed questions at the former headmaster.

Cammetti noticed that Snape's responses were quicker and more coherent than before. After a while Snape was obviously getting annoyed with his fellow AESOP who had begun to ask for details of some of Severus's potions secrets hidden in seemingly innocent questions.

"I am perfectly well! Now GO AWAY!" Severus Snape snarled.

Professor Cammetti chuckled and nodded to indicate the end of their little verbal battle. Then he finished his assessment and left his patient to advise Ilario of his finding and then to return home.

* * *

End part 6

Posted 8 April 2012 – with many, many, many apologies for the ridiculously long delay.


	7. Chapter 7

Part 7 Contented Boredom

Medusa awoke to a strange clinking and looked around to see if someone was making a speech. She grabbed the watch and opened it to discover the tiny arrow was pointed back towards 'freed from curse'.

'What,'she thought, 'have those dunderhead mediwizards done to her great-grandson?' She climbed creakily out of bed and tottered to the door, then took a deep breath and glided arthrytically to her sole living relative's room.

"You will be the death of me! Insisting on galavanting off out of your body like the ghost of some demented house elf." The old lady raised her cane over the end of Severus's bed.

"You are not a house elf!" Thwack, the cane hit the mattress, just missing Severus's feet. "And you will not do that again. Thwack. "And..."

"And it is time to let your great-grandson rest, Signora." Ilario had stepped up to Medusa, blocking her approach to the bed. "You really do have to stop doing this, Signora."

Severus raised his hand and wandlessly summonded Medusa's cane.

"If you are a very good girl you can have this back," Severus sneered Princely at her.

Medusa glared at her great-grandson. "Ha!" She sneered back and used her wand to summon another walking stick. "Keep the stick. You'll be needing it more than me. Child."

The old lady swept wobbily out the door, a happy smirk on her face.

* * *

"Did!" "Didn't!" "Did!"

"Will you shut up, you stupid old geezers!" The Sorting Hat yelled from its home on an upper bookshelf. "It no longer matters."

"Well, really! Such language."

"Obviously," said one of the more pompous headmasters, "the hat has been sitting on the heads of too many mischevious children."

"I had to do something to learn Modern English. It was all decent Saxon speaking when I was made, thank you very much," the hat grumbled. "There won't be a portrait!"

"And how do you know that?" Albus peered intently over his half-moon spectacles.

"Hogwarts said so." The Sorting Hat replied. "And before you yell at me, she didn't say why."

"It's an anti-Slytherin conspiracy!" Phineas Nigellus shook his fist at Albus Dumbledore. "This is all your fault!"

"It is not."

"Is too."

"Is not."

"Oh for Merlin's sake, someone stop them talking!" grumbled Headmaster Dippet.

A moment later there was a 'pop' and a plaque stating Severus Snape's months of service as Headmaster of Hogwarts appeared on the wall. At the same moment a wave of magic muted Dumbledore's and Nigellus's portraits.

The former Headmasters and Headmistresses were not sure if they should be unhappy with the plaque first or happy with the silence.

* * *

Severus had awakened somewhat shocked by the events of the last day. He had an oath to be the headmaster and to protect the school and its students. It was not an unbreakable oath but, like his oath with Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange, it had been broken by his death.

It could have been useful to use it in some way.

The former headmaster was angry and surprised on having not only died but having a new life with a freedom he hadn't expected. He had been atoning for something for more than joining the Death Eaters but exactly what that was eluded him. There were parts of his memory that explained it but the actual moment of his revelation was gone, as was his first memory of Lily Evans.

Severus recalled his decision to give his memories to Harry Potter, the annoying idiot gryffindor who lived to make his life a pain, but at the time he hadn't realised nor had he cared that surrendering so many memories would damage his brain's indexing system.

Severus had many memories of Lily now which for some reason the school had tried to take first. Perhaps because they were closest to the memories he had surrendered. Or perhaps because he had protected them. Severus didn't know and he really did not want to ask.

Whatever it was, something momentus had happened to Severus. He remembered Lily and how much he had cared for her but the pain and guilt over her death had eased. Perhaps it had eased long and but he had not allowed himself to notice. Or perhaps avenging her though the death of Voldemort and atoning for his actions had been more cathartic than he'd suspected it would be.

* * *

Over the next few days Severus bore the medical prodding and poking of the mediwizard stoically and sometimes silently. Slowly he opened more to his surrounding and the realisation that he could choose his future.

Three days after Professor Cammetti's visit, Ilario finally stopped visiting Severus. His patient was capable of looking after himself and good food, light exercise and rest would do more good than a mediwizard's interventions.

Severus had begun prowling around the small room and occasionally ventured into the dining room. That was Medusa's domain and, after two days of rest, the old lady had returned to her routine of reading, receiving and making visits to her neighbours and consulting a small pocket watch.

Severus soon found himself so bored after the workload and dramas of sixteen years of teaching that he decided to have his breakfast with Medusa rather than hiding in his room. Their breakfast was simple: Toast and marmalade with herbal tea for Medusa; Crusty bread, cheese, mushrooms, grilled tomatoes and coffee for Severus who was sure that the retirement village's house-elves were aiming to make him look like Horace Slughorn.

After breakfast Severus took the book he'd begun reading and sat by an open window when Madam Vogt saw him.

The short and plump Madam Vogt was the retirement village's local gossip and self-appointed 'town croaker'; she was too old and her voice too croaky to be the 'town crier'. By lunchtime all of the 'inmates' of the retirement village knew that Medusa's guest was on the mend.

Little did he know it but soon Severus's life would be filled with the curiosity and plotting of sixty seven elderly witches and wizards and his life would change again.

* * *

Severus frowned at the book and reached for his quill. 'Really, did these authors know nothing about their topic?' he thought as he scratched a note in the margin of Medusa's first edition copy of '1010 Ways to Annoy Your Neighbours'.

He sat back and enjoyed the peace and quiet, the book resting on the small table before him. Today he was content. Well, as content as any Prince wizard without an obsession could be.

"Severus, that is my book not yours! You wicked man!" Thwack!

OK, so mostly content and slightly bruised...

THE END


End file.
